So by now I guess everyone knows...it's official...I'm going to Haiti! My heart has been there ever since the earthquake, so now my body can follow it there, lol! I leave in one week with a medical team, so I can go moonlight as a nurse. I am super, super excited. I am also super, super nervous. First of all...I haven't worked in the nursing field in over 3 years...so good luck to all of my poor patients! If I put the enema in the wrong place, so sorry! Secondly, I suppose God has some great stuff planned...because Satan is digging in his heels and working hard on my mind. Luckily, he has no strong hold on my heart, it belongs to my Creator. I called one of my very best friends in the whole wide world...you know, the one you have to borrow their undies and they don't care (the one that is about 10 sizes smaller than me, lol!), the one that was with you when you birthed yo baby, the Christian sister and mentor that God places in your life? Yeah, I called that one. I was broken and in tears. Satan had placed some very real fears in my mind and I was feeling very defeated. She made me put on my big girl pants and look at it from God's perspective. She gave me scripture and rebuked Satan on my behalf. This morning she texted me more scripture...Psalm 121..."I lift my eyes unto the hills, where does my help come from?" And it goes on to say how God has covered me...I am in His hand. See...I know all of this...but I struggle with faith here because of how real Satan has made my fear. Hearing it from strong, faithful Christians, well, God is using His faithful to help me in my unbelief. He is using His word, He is using His people, He is using music...He is using His Holy Spirit. See, the Bible tells us there are fights over God's people between the Holy Spirit and evil forces. I can only imagine the battle that was going on over my head these last few days. Today, I thought the fear would be gone...it wasn't. It was as real as ever. So as I left my office this afternoon, I got into my little Honda and cranked up some Casting Crowns...in my tears and snot, I began to rebuke the evil one. The one that has tried to convince me he is in control. But he's not. See, that victory, for my heart and soul, it's been won. It was won over 2000 years ago by the One who wanted my heart more...the One that loved me enough to pay for my transgressions. So I told Satan he is officially done. I will have no more of it in Jesus Holy name and he might as well give up. I do not fear him, I do not fear his control...cause he has no chance at controlling me. I am in God's hands...I am protected in the shadows of His grace and mercy. I belong to Him and no other. God ultimately asked the question of me, "Who do you love most, Leslie?" and my obvious answer was my Lord...so, He said...then follow me.

I don't like leaving my family for a week and a half...and I've received criticism for that. That's okay...I am far more concerned with God's opinion of me than man's. I covet your prayers in the next couple of weeks. I want to look forward to my trip with my anticipation and excitement in going to a foreign country and helping others. It's unchartered waters for me, a trip of this depth and magnitude. I want to be armed well with God's full armour...His love...His word...His strength...and His hope. So I say, God, guard my mind, guard my heart...keep the evil one at bay. I will not utter his name, as it is worthless to my worship of You. May I stay fully focused on You and only You as my heart is prepared to serve. Amen.